Reality feels like it’s getting thinner all the time. It used to feel solid. I felt confident that existence was a real thing. These days, I feel like if I’m not gentle, I might just poke through reality with my finger. And find what? Some different reality? Some more real reality? Would it negate this reality, or would it just be another illusion?

This is what happened when I stopped trusting my senses. But how can I when I know they are so easily duped? We are creating alternative realities all the time. I suppose we always have with our stories, but now it’s different. Interactive media is getting more convincing all the time? How long will I, or any of us, be able to keep track of what is real and what is not?

Maybe everything is real. Maybe a thing becomes real as soon as it is imagined, and it becomes more real the more firmly it is believed in. Maybe that is why we cling to our beliefs with such vigor. When you bring my beliefs into question, you bring my reality into question. You make my reality less real, and if I believe there can only be one single reality, that’s a problem. My mind loops back on itself.

I crave something to believe in. I am afraid to feel unmoored. What happens if I give up my belief in everything even myself? What happens if I believe in everything? That every thought is real and tangible? That every dream is real? That real exists on a spectrum of belief?